Two years ago I wrote about a visit with an old friend whose health is not good. She is the person who introduced my partner and me, so of course, she is very special to us. Well, she recently visited again with her husband - their daughter lives near us - and I didn't have the same kind of emotional reaction as I had the last time. I think for one thing, her previous visit touched a place in my heart that kind of preserved in a sacred shrine the time and place where I was when I knew her before. It seemed like such a powerful time in my life, so full of love. It was, in addition, the time and community in which I met my husband. And it all seemed to be cut so short by our moving away. About three months into our marriage, my husband had a very serious accident at work, and after that, he wanted to move away. He had been in the service, stationed in the Bay Area, so that's where he wanted to return. I think now, that I had some of those 'unfinished feelings' for my friends, relatives, and even places that we left behind, and my visitor really touched those feelings two years ago and they flared up.
This time, though, I was much more able to see her objectively, to see her family and realize that they've lived a whole lifetime without us. She and I went out for tea together and talked, and it was very nice. I had an unusually safe, loved feeling toward the end of our meeting, and I realized that I felt this way a lot during that year-and-a-half that I lived near her when she introduced my husband and me, and I realized that I had 'expected' that feeling to continue after we moved, but it didn't. I guess it was her.
I'm glad that she says she'll be coming out more often. I'd really like that. It feels good to keep connected to her and to that special feeling that was the seed-bed, really, of the rest of my life.
By the way, my partner was on the freeway at 3:45 am yesterday (Sunday) morning, driving to a volkswagen meet, when he saw the tanker on fire that melted the interchange connector at the Bay Bridge maze. Traffic was routed toward San Francisco, and motorists made a u-turn at the appropriate place and were able to drive back towards 580 East. G. said he couldn't see the collapsed connector, only the flames. Still, what are the odds of actually being there on the scene?